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Saturday, October 2, 2010

For the one woman I remain in awe of.

Shhh baby.
Let's not cry anymore. The time for tears has passed us, don't you think? We've cried our share and now it's time to wipe those eyes and stop the Kohl running. Your eyes are way too beautiful for the mascara to smudge them over and over again. Your gaze is so comforting that one look at your face and I feel so blessed and touched. Like my very soul is at peace.

You do that to me Ma.. only you. You and all the little things you do. All the things you've ever done. You've made me so proud of being your daughter.. am I even worthy of being one? You've always led by example and never have you let the generation gap affect us darling. You were my first ever best friend and continue to be.

It just hit me. I would always crib about my best friends leaving me or backstabbing me deserting me. I am a whiner, you know it. But I never stopped to realize that I've had one constant best friend for over nineteen years now. I am luckier than everybody else. I have had a best friend since 14th of November, when I became a part of you.

I know life's been hard on you and me. And on us together. But together we can brave it all out. You make me want to brave it out. You make me strong. You keep me going when I just want to raise my hands up in despair and give up. You know what we have isn't just a normal mother-daughter relation, right? It's so much more. You're so much more.

"Everything always happens for a reason.
That's what destiny is.
Well, no more worries, rest your head and go to sleep.
Maybe one day we'll wake up and this will all just be a dream.
Now, hush little baby, don't you cry. Everything's going to be alright."

I can see anything in this world, except see you break. Your strength is like a constant for me now. I can't see that one constant change. Life's always been one long row of changes and inconsistency. But you're the one who was never inconsistent. You've been the one stable force, all my life. You never walked out on me. You never left me standing alone.

You read my unwritten stories. You heard my unspoken words.
I hold nothing against you. It's okay to have missed a few of them. I always wanted to be an actress remember? I guess I was a good actor afterall. (Sorry, bad attempt at humor)

"You be good and don't you miss me.
Few more years and I'll be done with college.
And I'll be making history, like I do.
You know, it's all because of you..
We can do whatever we want to..
This one's for you, oh here's to you.."

So now is not the time to cry baby. Hold every precious tear back. It's time to celebrate. It's the time to lay back and watch all your dreams about me come true. Watch me become every colour that you raised me to be. Watch me be your rainbow baby, I will be the rainbow to your sky.

4 comments:

  1. I've complete faith in you when you say that some day you'll be my rainbow.Destiny is not what I believe in, I believe in you.Period
    This piece like all the previous ones is a showstopper(likealways).Thats what separatesyou out from the masses.Keep writing always,for me...........cuz I really look forward to it,it makes my day when i see something new posted on the blog.You have it in you to reach out and touch people's heart.

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  2. Thanks ma. I think I take that from you, the touching people's heart thing, because you do it to me everytime you smile :D

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  3. One more time i'm forced to comment cuz I reread it today andyour faith in my consistency,my stability,my constancy-it all gives me so much strength and energy to last this lifetime.I simply adore the way you put it all in words.I assume or rather presume none else could do it.
    An ardent fan.

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  4. Yes, so whenever you feel down and out, you should give this a read.
    "As deep as the abyss where the waters run,
    as deep as the land of the rising sun,
    I'll know when you're down,
    and even when the odds are against us,
    It doesn't even matter,
    you have me,
    and nothing else matters."

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