He sat back and looked at the mess he'd made. His reputation for creating havoc preceeded him. The pool of blood, the scarred face. There used to be a smile there somewhere but he took the liberty to erase that. Forever. Funny word that. Her incessant usage of it used to bug him no end though he never said it out loud. Now no more. He was free.
If I leave here tomorrow,
Would you still remember me?
For I must be travelling on now,
'Cause there's too many places I've got to see.
He did believe in the beauty of a perfect crime. He hadn't intended to pull the trigger, no. But it was inevitable. She was asking for it really. Her with her constant whining about it being too sunny and it raining too less and him being too absentee. Well, he was here now and so was she. He traced his initials on her palm. The stupid thing she always used to slip in his - make him feel tied down. Tied to the one that he fit with with ease. But he wasn't the missing clue to a puzzle. He was the puzzle himself. He wasn't one to need someone to fit with.
The bourbon rested neatly on her sidestand, a few drinks still left on account of her horrible capacity. She used to be able to drink when they'd met. He wiped his gun clean with the seams of her dress. Her fragrance was soon starting to fade though as the pool of blood took over, drop by drop. That annoyed him. He used to like being able to tell them all different without needing so much as a second whiff. Damn this red fluid for masking everything the same.
He gulped down the drinks and then began the tedious task of erasing everything that might link him to the crime scene. There were books scattered around, with blood splattered on them. Hitchhiker's and Lord of The Rings caught his eye. He slipped them into the black leather bag first. Few fairytales and romance novels went in next. Damn, such a girl. There was a wrist watch with it's strap half undone due to the slight struggle she'd put up. He pocketed that. Next to seep into darkness were the toys that she had around since she was a kid. They were smiling still, almost eerily now at the fate they'd brought upon her. Serves her right, refusing to grow up despite repeated warnings.
He tore up the pictures on her cardboard. All the faces were familiar, he'd heard one too many stories about them all. She liked clinging to people, holding on to them long after they were gone. She liked to believe the best in everyone. Well, so much for unconditional love and blind faith. She'd know better than to trust a stranger next time and welcome him into her life. He took out his Swiss knife and played around with her skin, marking it with him. Good thing she couldn't tremble now, that might've halted his strokes.
He opened her drawer next. The combination lock was simple for him really. She never had kept one too many secrets. He knew her like the lyrics of the songs he first heard when he was five. Those kind of things tend to stick. As he stumbled upon a bundle of unsent letters tied up and kept in the corner, he decided to read just a few. However a few pages down the reading, he felt his eyes get numb. The bitch. She hadn't been lying. He'd always thought she was for that made things easier but these letters said otherwise. Next he hunted for the diary she was known to dutifully scribble in. Holding his head in his hands, he read words that were once exchanged. He slammed the drawer shut.
Deciding to grace the floor with his skin, he sat beside her this once and held her in his arms. So fragile still, he recalled how happy she'd been to see him. He looked at the flowers scattered on the floor that he'd bought earlier that evening and retraced her words, "Flowers, really? For me?"
He had just nodded. The grin that followed was quite unnecessary he felt. She went on, "How come?"
He'd answered reluctantly, "Today marks something."
Those eyes had lit up instantly. The fool was expecting something else and he knew that all along. He grazed those hair that he'd loosened from the pony they were tied into earlier.
"You'll stay the night?" she had asked him.
"Maybe."
But if I stayed here with you girl,
Things just couldn't be the same.
'Cause I'm free as a bird now,
And this bird you cannot change.
Her eyes were still open. She had actually thought he was kidding when he'd pulled out that gun. She'd said again, "You cannot hurt me." That was what triggered it. How could she be so naive? There was no place for the innocent anymore, didn't she know that already? Hadn't he taught her anything? There was a split second of amazement when the bullet hit her chest, he hadn't been able to shoot her head though watching a splattered brain had been kind of a personal wish, but he couldn't bring himself to do it. He didn't catch her as she fell to the floor either. He towered over her, as she looked up to him and tried to smile. He could see the why forming on her lips which was when he silenced her by putting one more bullet, right through the heart this time. The eyes took just a second to freeze as she managed to get those words out in a bare whisper, the stubborn mad girl, "Im meleth le."
Bye, bye, baby, it's been a sweet love,
Though this feeling I can't change.
But please don't take it badly,
'Cause the Lord knows I'm to blame.
Those eyes would infest his brain for a while. He did love those. Once.
Those eyes were what remained in his memory as he decided to set it all to fire. He emptied a bottle of her favourite whiskey over her and those belongings that made her who she was, and then lit the match as he stepped out in the cold street. As he watched her go down, burn to ashes, once and for all, her with all her insanity, he felt liberated. Little did he know, she'd haunt his dreams still. With that same smile he'd wiped off and that pair of eyes he'd taken out the life from. Forever. Funny word, that.
Oh good, another sunny Disney movie :)
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
DeleteAren't I just your favourite Princess ? :P
Delete
ReplyDeleteRight up there with Xena, little one....right up there with Xena :)
Oo. Xena I like. She's HOT. And sigh, haven't been called little one in so long. :')
DeleteXena used to be on AXN innit? And when was the last time you'd been called that? :D
DeleteWell, the ex whose inspired all these dark posts used to call me that. It'll be about six months in a week, give or take.
DeleteOkay, Shiromi. This faux pas of mine is worse than the time I went to someone's wedding and made fun of the bridegroom's beer belly, right in front of his father (which I did not know then), much to the mortification of my parents. I apologise to you. Damn the happy fourteenth line :O
ReplyDeleteHeh it's fine really Sush (can I call you that? I usually hate people abbreviating my name.) It is funny how you goofed up a 'happy fourteenth, you' with age though. Like. Heh.
DeleteDear Shiromi, you may call me Bobby Darling if you so wish. And right now, let me adjust myself to the fact that what I believed to be real, is in fact not. We live in the Matrix, Shiromi. :/
ReplyDeleteHeh nah, that's too.. Okay can't come up with an appropriate word even. I guess I'll stick with Sushmit. What does it mean bytheway? Oh and. Maybe it's all just a dream within a dream, planted in our brains like the virus of an idea?
DeleteA lady talking INCEPTION? I laaaaikes :D :D :D
DeleteAnd Sushmit means, ah well...'One who has a nice smile'. Are we done embarrassing me yet? Or is there more to come? :P And I am going to make a ridiculous guess, but are you in the blessed land of Philippines?
Glad you approve my Lord.
DeleteHeh, no not quite yet. I still want to know your pet name you see :P
And yeup, I am.
Thank god, I was going to make a really terrible joke about you having so many visitors from Philippines, but checked myself in time; lesson learnt, see? :P
ReplyDeleteMy pet name is Ronnie, if you must know :)
Why does Shiromi have an asterisk next to it, akin to 'conditions apply' ?
Yes, you made good this time. People do learn afterall :P
DeleteAha Ronnie. Reminds me of Ranvijay somehow. But you couldn't possibly be hot enough :P
That's exactly what's intended because. Terms&Conditions apply. There isn't exactly a simple symbol for Handle With Care you see :P
Hot? Oh no, I don't consider myself hot, nor blindingly intelligent, nor do I have a body to kill for, oh no, not at all :D :D I don't overestimate myself; just your average check-shirted guy, you see :)
DeleteHas anyone noticed that asterisk, till date? :P
Ah. And I settle for anything but ordinary :P
DeleteThough I do have a major thing for stripes and checks :D
And you'd be surprised to know how many actually. Give the world some credit. There are other observant blokes out there y'know.
The thing with ordinary people is that people never have too many expectations from you. And when you surpass them, its an inexpressibly happy feeling, that is why I always consider myself the underdog. A lot less pressure, Shiromi :) And oh, what about kurta and jeans? :P
DeleteAnd a Nobel Prize for the other observant people out there ^_^
DeleteAh so you deliberately underplay it in order to eventually blow someone away? Pretty smart.
DeleteHeh, depends on whether or not the person in question can pull it off.
And come on now. You're just degrading the honour of Nobels now :P
DeleteNo Shiromi, not deliberate. I just have an innate flair for this :P And okay, Alfred Nobel gets added to the no-joke list :D
DeleteHeh, well then I guess you have it easy. When people expect nothing but the best of you, including yourself, then life truly becomes a pain.
DeleteWhy thank you :P
you're welcome. :)
DeleteAnd how come you chose Philippines? It's not exactly a conventional study destination?
Does anything about me at all come across as conventional to you? Btw, when's your birthday? I'm kinda into zodiacs.
DeleteAnd well, to answer your question properly - I wanted to be some place with a beach (I do not do well in the cold) and I had a really close friend here already.
If it were conventional, we wouldn't be having this conversation, especially through such a novel mode. As far as the cold is concerned, a virtual high 5 from my side; i despise winters. Philippines, hmm. Not much idea except the location and the capital, bet the weather there is right up your alley :) as for my birthday, its the second of August...... Leo, Shiromi :)
ReplyDeleteHeh yeah. It's almost like going back to having a pen friend. Though I do miss the feel of actual crisp parchment in my hand. Same. Like I'm not a fan of heat either but summers over winters, anyday. Where do you stay waise?
DeleteHeh yeah. It's damn pretty though. Way better than the likes of the hyped up Bangkok.
I knew it. I was to be a Leo but couldn't stay long enough in mommy's boring womb. :P
Er... parchment? Was your pen friend by any chance Harry Potter?
DeleteAnd I stay in the land of DTCs and the notorious MCD, Dilli :)
And then I presume you are a Virgo? Or Gemini...I don't really set much store by astrology. As Sheldon would say, "it tells us that you participate in the mass cultural delusion that the sun's apparent position relative to arbitrarily defined constellations at the time of your birth somehow affects your personality" :D :D
Heh. Why yes. He's had a long time crush on me. Ginny should really thank me for not having taken him away :P
ReplyDeleteOo. Dilli me lowes. My favourite city in the whole wide world.
Well quoted. And no, I'm a cancerian.
And you must be hailing from Transylvania, missy? :) indeed dilli is a louwly place, especially the walled part, which i've explored a bit. They have brilliant food there, you know. And how come you knew I was a Leo?
DeleteBTW, ye suno :) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UDzEKGbXwHc
DeleteWhere in delhi do you stay? I feel like a stalker now but wth. And just. Our tete-a-tete ensured that either you were a Cancer or a Leo.
DeleteAnd I have watched the movie. Beautiful it is. But I thought I mentioned I'm not much into instrumentals/trance? Lyrics make up the essence of a song for me :)
ReplyDeleteI stay in Dwarka. You knows about eet? And Leo and Cancer people generally prefer to converse through blog comments? :)
DeleteI too, have watched it, Ma'am. But yes, being the country bumpkin that I am, I so love instrumentals. Come on, take Titanic.... Celine Dion's done-to-death 'My Heart Will Go On' is now plain annoying; but take a listen to this, and tell me if this wonderful, wonderful piece of music isn't better. Go on, little one, go on! :)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IlVD4TJsE-Y&feature=related
Zes zes I do!
DeleteHeh no. We're just somehow alike, in an odd way, hence.
I love being called that :*
And arey. Just this once I'll give it to you but that's just because of how very very overplayed Dion's song is.
So, your Transylvania is Delhi? ^_^
DeleteHow are we alike? I mean, you have a 104 posts titled under 'Love'. And I am as romantic as Pikachu on steroids :P
And do you like that name, now? Fond memories, I guess?:)
And THAT, my friend, is precisely why I chose Titanic; see I got you to agree with me, it all depends on the right choices in an argument :D
Heh I wouldn't go as far, but yeah kinda.
DeleteNo just certain things. The vibes. Can't explain. I'm a very intuitive person, bas. Usually gets me fucked also but still. :P
Yes, very. :)
Haha. Smart move Sushmit. I bow down to thee. :P
You must be a perceptive kid indeed, Shiromi :) still, where are you from? and no, i am generally not in the habit of 'fucking' with people, both literally and figuratively. Don't worry on that count :) And yes, I am quite the emperor, aren't I? :D
DeleteLol.. I'm from Jaipur. The Pink City :D
DeleteAll my summers and winters and long weekends were spent in Delhi though.
Okay then I can sleep peacefully with that reassurance on such a public forum :P
Just this one time, yes. Anything else my Lord? :P
Aha, the NH-8 separates us then :)
DeleteAnd yes, that is why, they call it a 'public' declaration, carries much weight, this. See? :P
Yes Shiromi, write a story about unicorns pliss? :P
Yes, that's all that's between us ;)
ReplyDeleteLol.
Unicorns? Really? How about mermaids?
Look, I like girls. I detest fish more than I like girls. So overall, mermaids go into negative territory, so no, no mermaids :>
DeleteAnd yes, NH-8 hi to hai :D
You're no fun. I like mermaids. They're half human. And 'Shiro' means fish in Japanese. Been told I drink like one. So.
ReplyDeleteAccording to my dear friends, I am the most boring person alive. How I love them :')
DeleteYou could go for centaurs, they're half-human too. And so you drink. Well, hello, Captain Haddock :P
Really? Boring? That's not a description I give anyone mostly. I doubt you'd be the exception. What do you do anyway? Like done with your engineering or still stuck with those equations?
ReplyDeleteCentaurs aren't as pwetty as Mermaids.
Heh you don't? :P
No, even boring people call me boring. See, basically I do nothing substantial, but I'm in the final year of chemical engineering, and yes, I have an interview on the 12th. And yes, I am stuck with those equations for life, Shiromi :D
DeleteAnd no, I don't drink; its not that I'm a sanctimonious prude or anything, but to put it in very basic terms, I simply do not like the taste or the feel of alcohol. And I'd rather sit at home with a good book and some Colombian coffee, than bawl and scream myself out at a pub or a disc.
Reading this, I have to confess that even Percy Weasley seems like the Gummy Bears as compared to me :)
What college are you doing your engineering from?
DeleteOo. All the best for that. I have a LOT of engineer, future engineer, and aspiring engineer friends and quite a bunch in 4th year so I know all about the placement paranoia. How are you at first impressions and that sort of stuff anyway?
Ah alright. You're missing something though, I'll give you that. And a pub/disc is anyway not the way to drink after a while. Horribly monotonous and pretentious that is.
Lol. True that.
Ps. Listen to: Hallelujah - Leornard Cohen.
I am from IP University, naam to suna hi hoga :D University School Of Chem Tech. How am I at first impressions? That is something which you should tell me. Well, the benefits of not getting drunk are many. I get to drive, which is something I enjoy doing. And yes, coffee is my be all and end all. So yes, fortunately or unfortunately,I have this 'good boy' tag stuck to me :)
DeleteAnd I have listened to it, Shiromi ..I have :) Which stage of medicine are you in?
Lol, actually yes :P
DeleteNot bad actually. But then again impressions over the virtual world are or can be a lot different from real life. So :/
I do hope you know though that girls these days, (or actually always) have a thing for bad guys :P
Nice. Heard the cover by Buckley?
For me it's a 1.5 year foundation course plus four years of Medicine. I'm done with my foundation and 1st year proper. SO currently in second year Medicine.
Yes, that is indeed true. Well, I'll be judged pretty soon, you know :) And yes, girls have always had a thing for the proverbial 'bad boys', whereas alas, I never try to look or be cool see...Regular kurta-jeans person :D
DeleteNope, be a lamb and send the link, will you? And technically, you are a kid then. I thought you're almost a practising doc :D
^50th comment. Woot!!
DeleteI wish you truckloads of luck. :*
DeleteHeh that's a refreshing change just btw. Oh sure. Wait.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y8AWFf7EAc4
No man. Let's hope I get there.
Hi5 buddy :P
Truck rhymes with luck :>
DeleteAnd of course you'll get there, unless the world ends, that is. :)
Lol. Thanks for the note :P
DeleteNah. The world is too big of a pain to end so easily. And I might just say 'fuck it' midway. I'm not a fan of the country or the college.
Seriously? Isn't your latest post in direct contrast to your statement? :O
DeleteLol. Missed the sarcasm, did you?
ReplyDeleteYes, by a mile and a half, chum :P
DeleteAh dammit. Just when I thought you were one of the smart ones :P
ReplyDeleteTold you, I'm not. You should've read the instruction manual before opening my pack :)
DeleteMail me that manual?
DeleteIts 800 pages long and written in traditional Mandarin. Still want a bite?
DeleteAnd oh, I just looked you up on FB. Who isn't a victim anyway?
DeleteWell, sure, if you play translator :P
DeleteAnd yeah? Why did I not have a pending friend request then today? :/
Also, actually I want my cover to read something else. Lyrics from a song from Rockstar. But no posters online and I am too lazy to make.
Well, you are the one who's in Manchurian land. (Apologies for being racist and generalising the great East with 'manchurian', but hey it's tasty :P ) Oh yes, you might have overlooked the request thing; if you could be a lamb and check it again :)
DeleteI wish I was in Manchurian land man. Here there's no Chinese. At all. *sniff
DeleteAnd that's only like my favourite cuisine in the effing world.
Aha, smooth. Very smooth Sushmit :P
Well, to me, they're all Ctrl-C+Ctrl V....sorry again :P must be very easy to spot someone like you there :)
DeleteWell, I can't help it if you overlooked the request the first time, can I? :D
Well, I can't put a finger on your origins, but I think you're definitely pretty :)
DeleteAnd when people hear my name, I could be a Rastafarian for all they care.
:$
DeleteWhy, thank you.
:$ ye kya hai? :O
Delete:$ = Emoticon for embarrassed.
DeleteToday's generation, I tell you.
DeleteSo says the guy who keeps sending me memes. ironic much? :P
DeleteHey! Memes indicate sentiments very very clearly; thereby saving a whole lot of typing effort, whereas I thought this emoticon meant your monthly allowance was increased substantially. :|
DeleteWell, if you typed this in a smart phone (preferably a Blackberry) - this would too.
DeleteAnd ah, if only!
I have a phone smarter than myself, so all phones are smart for me, ji han :)
DeleteIf it were conventional, we wouldn't be having this conversation, especially through such a novel mode. As far as the cold is concerned, a virtual high 5 from my side; i despise winters. Philippines, hmm. Not much idea except the location and the capital, bet the weather there is right up your alley :) as for my birthday, its the second of August...... Leo, Shiromi :)
ReplyDeleteglass bongs