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Tuesday, October 29, 2013


There are few things in life which can transport you to an alternate universe and music is clearly leading the charts by leaps and bounds. No, I doubt even drugs can do to you what a few simple notes of music can. But then again I'm an amateur so you can blame my inexperience.

Watching someone perform live - someone as enigmatic as AR Rahman, Grammy and Academy Award Winner was never going to be a mean feat. But to be completely wowed and mesmerised into oblivion, I did not expect. To have goosebumps and tears and shivers down my spine - singing with him, yelling rather, not knowing happiness from sadness or joy from misery was a sort of self actualisation of its own.

A mention of how humble he is, is an absolute necessity. Punctual and so down to earth. It was like watching one of your best friends perform which made the whole experience feel even more out of the body. The musician next door if there can be such a thing ever. He defines talent is another matter altogether. From the piano to the harmonium there was not an instrument on the stage he did not grace. No false airs and a beautiful smile which brought the audience to its feet every single time.

Every song was better than the previous and you realized just how little studio time this guy must need for his songs are perfect the first time he sings them. A guy so connected to his roots that he visited the Darga while in Rajasthan, and ensured that he sang in Tamil. I found myself at a loss of what to do - record his performance, clap and cheer, sing or attempt to anyway for in his wake I doubt anyone can even delude themselves into thinking they can sing or just sit there like a statue mesmerised and watching him as he blowed life into me through his notes and symphonies.

I'm so happy that I had the honour of having him as my first concert artist. Rahman, you're truly a legend, the work of a genius. I came as a fan of your music and left as one of yours. The fireworks that went on endlessly as the night was drawing to an end with Jai Ho as a soundtrack, I found my feet follow those of the hundreds with me as I stood on makeshift heightened chairs. I'm not a fan of the song in particular but I have to admit it was like being of something bigger - something that meant something to every single person in the stands. 

It was like watching Sachin make a century, or Bindra win a medal. Rahman, your music has united every indian. As for me, it's an inspiration. You're an inspiration. For the first time ever, Thank you for the music.

Rahman said, "When a song becomes a success, it doesn't belong to you anymore. People won't let it."
You don't need the song. You define success. You are success.

"Jab kahin pe kuch nahin bhi nahi tha, wahi tha, wahi tha, wahi tha.."
I think you meant music here Rahman. For yours superseded God and all his subsidiaries.
#respect #concerts

Thursday, October 17, 2013

A surge of memories.

That's the funny thing about visits and travel and vacations - odd moments take you back to long forgotten memories. Or memories you've tried hard to forget. It has a term in psychology. Episodic buffer. Recent events remind you of old ones since they tend to trigger episodes.

It's so funny as to how neatly my life is now wrapped. Into compartments. I only open one at a time and I'm quite content but sometimes, some rare occasions do cause me an emotional explosion even now. When the past meets present and haunts the future and I don't know how to link the dots or gather the pieces to this unsolvable puzzle.

I'm happy with a few of my life choices though they still have a long way to go in proving me right. But somethings just feel right. And even as I type this I know the naïve me is back. I just can't shake the fear of being let down. Thank you, you. For ruining love for me forever.

But a coward I never was and never will be. And this time around when the time comes, the leap of faith I will be ready to take. Jump all the way. Cross this divide of uncertainty.

For nothing but me this time.
Let's see if I've learnt afterall.