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Sunday, December 4, 2011


You know I plan. It's an inherent habit and not one that bleeds out of my skin ever despite many a lesson by Murphy. I look forward to things enough to jinx them eventually. Over a period of time, this has eventually made me apprehensive. About anything good. But planning is in my bones. It's in the essence of everything I ever do.

It doesn't help when these plans turn to nothing but they give me something to look forward to. And I was looking forward to this wedding a lot, for a long time. Now it'll pass me by, with not so much as a second to remember it by. All those songs we were meant to dance together on, the alcohol I was supposed to sneak in, the tears I was to help you not cry and the hot boys we were to flirt with without being caught doing the same.

Maybe in another lifetime.

I was striding towards December with blinders on until now, but now that it's here, what do I do with it? It brings with it this feeling of an immeasurable loss. Everyone's calling it the Friday of the year. But I know once you finally reach it, Monday's never far behind and it sneaks up on you, sooner than you expect it to.

Have I lost my winter even before it had the chance grace me with it's chills? Have I lost you even before I got to be held in your arms and look in those eyes, one last time? Did I make all these plans, all my life to watch them burn to ashes before they could even come alive?


  1. First time here.
    Im sure to come back.
    Just thought you'd like to know.

    About the post : Im not a fan of planning. Nevertheless, Hang in there :)