Half-full.

Today I will myself into happiness and action. BECAUSE - the past few days and weeks have been nothing short of beautiful and perfect. And if staying sad is a disease, then I've had enough of it for a lifetime. I had reason to, but no more. Now life is pretty fucking perfect. Well, as close to it as it gets anyway. Minor speed bumps aside, of course. 

Hasna nahi yaad rehta

So let's remind you my love. Let's relive the perfection that the birthday week at phu quoc was. You lost your father and your bags, quite literally on the same time and managed both so differently. You know what that speaks to? Your ability to learn, adapt, and grow. You went to an amusement, theme, and water park -- all in the span of a week. You made new friends out of nowhere, shopped but in limits, walked your ass off every single day without giving up, ate (a lot!) but remembered to be healthy too somehow, swam, oh boy did you swim in pools, seas, and oceans! 

Kismat mein meri chain se jeena likh de

Amen to that! Here's to embracing calm over chaos. Thriving in it. Building a life that knows nothing but it and settles for nothing less. That understands the difference between fun, adrenaline, and danger. That doesn't crave self-sabotage just to win a made-up battle of worthiness and lovability. 

Hum gareebon ke din bhi sawar jayenge 

If we just make it out of our heads. If we give in to the beauty, the music, the magic that surrounds us. If we don't absorb the pain of the world quite as intensely. If we continue to decompress from time to time and remember what's ours and what's not ours to hold. We can empathise without making it our own. We can be happy even if others are struggling. We have permission. You have my permission to be happy, Shiromi.

Kabhi sun bhi toh lo humaari battiyyan 

It's time the inner guide gets more airtime than the inner critic. You can stop evaluating everything. You can rest. You can sleep my love. And more than anything, you can smile. The managers have been at work very hard, very long. We have got to create some balance for them. Achievement is NOT everything. It has been a trauma response. But you were always worthy, lovable, and ENOUGH. Let's be enough ok?

Jitne khaali the jaam, sab bhar jayenge

It's been a long ride, we can let the cape and armour down now okay? We too can lie on the beach or float on the water, carefree, without a worry in the world. It is now our life. Let that sink in. No more fight/flight/freeze/fawn. Now we can lie back, read the book he wrote for us, allow happiness to take root. It's time to bloom. 

Thank you, universe. 

Thank you Shiromi, for making it far enough for us to see this.